These women are NOT your friends!

Here’s a recent letter from Ask Amy:

Dear Amy: The Super Bowl is approaching, and, as a woman who likes sports, each year I am stymied about how to get to actually watch the game when hosting or attending a party.

Every year, we either hold a party or attend a party that includes my husband’s male friends and couples we both know.

I would love to lounge on the couch with the rest of the male audience and watch at least part of the game.

What invariably happens is that I end up in the kitchen with the women who would rather chat and clean the kitchen while the men are occupied with the game.

Is there a gracious way to make my way to the TV during the game without seeming rude to my friends who aren’t interested in the game?

—Stuck in the Kitchen

Dear Stuck: The Super Bowl is a uniquely high-stakes entertainment experience in which the usual ideas of gracious behavior don’t necessarily apply.

If you want to watch the game with the guys, you’ll simply have to act as they do. Following is my (admittedly sexist) primer for watching the Super Bowl:

Stake out a spot on the couch and don’t leave it unless absolutely necessary.

Call out loudly to your spouse when you need a beer refill, and when you get it, say, “Thanks, hon—you’re the best. Some chips and dip would be awesome” without making eye contact.

During the halftime show, meander into the kitchen to eat directly out of the fridge.

When the game starts again, fight with your neighbor for your coveted seat, which he will take.

Watching the Super Bowl is a full-contact sport, but I assume you can handle it.

Amy’s answer is one of the dumbest things I have ever read.  Not all men act like Neanderthals, and there is no reason the letter-writer should do so, either.

It’s a SUPER BOWL party.  The purpose of it is to hang out and watch the SUPER BOWL.  People who do not wish to watch the game should not attend, let them have their own little hen party somewhere else.

If this woman wants to watch the game, then she should just go and watch it.  There is no law that dictates that just because she has boobs and two X chromosomes means that she should stay in the kitchen with other women, and talk about makeup, shoe-shopping, or admiring the hostess’ new Bamboo Blinds.

If these so-called “friends” cannot accept that she wants to watch the Super Bowl, then they are NOT her friends.  End of story.